They say the second ones come faster. My body, this vessel, remembered it was a home once before.
My body, this vessel, remembered holding something sacred deep within and giving it away to a world of another kind of light.
With urgency she, my body, gave to me night pains rocking and rolling me to her song.
She then says to me “Here. Look. See.” A seal wrapped with red ribbon, this day is a gift.
Picking up tempo, the depth of the bass radiates to my backside like a summer heat wave. Skin squeezing sweat and pushing up vowels through my teeth popping my jaw open.
We made God laugh and I cried.
I, wanted the ocean for you. I, wanted the hum of Toure’s Ruby. I, wanted yellow light. God indeed did laugh.
She, my body this vessel, said time was something unhuman but holy.
Rising from my womb opening passages for you, guiding you by only her air. She sharply bends ahhhhhhhhhs
into something “unfamiliar,” something bush wild.
Something equally natural yet “frightening.” Some kind of gorgeous power plucked from the dirt.
You crowned and I – i – said “i can’t”. Washing over me, like how a mother draws warm bath water, a doula’s voice whispers “You caaan.”
I stood there. I – can. Looking over my shoulder to all the women releasing their energy to me, holding me in that way, “Push mama.” We can.
I squat and I stand.
I stand and I squat, opening before God asking for mercy but expecting grace.
We, my body and I and you sang this new song, tearing it up to the second degree of time and ahhhgrrrrrrrrrrrrrAh
There. You. Are.
Honey baby child.
15 hours after losing my sacred seal (mucous plug), baby Parker was earth side. It happened so extremely fast and I cannot thank my husband and amazing doula enough. Parker debuted on January 25th, the day after my birthday.
Nachelle Wilson is a former NHL and NBA cheerleader who took to the skies as a flight attendant and now resides in Palm Springs, California with her husband and two sons as she continues her education as a full spectrum doula. Wilson had a selection of poems published in The Eclectic literary magazine at the University of West Georgia, where she studied English Literature and Creative Writing. Nachelle is also a photography enthusiast, and like in her writing, believes a truthful moment is more important than presenting a perfect thing. This pragmatic Aquarius is an introvert who prefers tea to coffee, rest to going out, and any place near a body of water.
Follow Nachelle’s journey and work on Instagram!