When was your last orgasm? We long for connection and are magnetized by attraction and compelled by the urge to merge into oneness. Passion is what connects us to life, and desire is our portal to divine union. Ecstasy is our birthright, and it’s the source of all living things. Sex is more than just our single desire as individuals for intimate connection or erotic experiences. It is the most profound expression of the power of creation. The mating drive is one of the most powerful forces in the world. Your sexuality is a mere piece of your primal power and pulsing life force that governs the Universe, and it connects you to that hot cosmic energy.
How you relate to and operate with that power has a profound impact on your life. You can repress or restrict it, but it then shows up in other areas of your life. On the other hand, you can embrace it and you can celebrate it. You can learn to consciously open your inner portal to your sexual life force, gain access to divine bliss, and link to your wild glow power, thereby driving yourself farther along this transformative journey.
If you want to have better sex and more satisfying intimate relationships, start with yourself! We embrace our sexuality by learning how our bodies engage in and respond to sex, by creating mental space to allow arousal to stir and knowing when to pull back the reins and push full steam ahead. The more you understand who you are sexually and how you operate, the better you will be in all areas of your life.
What turns you on? People with vulvas have an interconnected network of structures that act together to choreograph arousal and orgasm. Sexual arousal is an altered state of consciousness, which means it is a mind-body mode that takes us outside of our ordinary state of awareness into an elevated, trancelike state. (Dreaming, meditation, and even child- birth are other altered states induced by the brain and breath). Arousal trance is characterized by a deep awareness of bodily sensations, a feeling of warped time and space, and decreased pain perception, resulting in heightened pleasure. Arousal is your guide, and all you have to do is go where it takes you; it taps us into an immediate physical and emotional experience. The capacity for arousal and orgasm is something we are born with. You will have reached full sexual maturity and blossomed into full sexual power when you can appropriately use the full spectrum of your core and supplementary powers. Being “turned on” in life is tapping into your bliss.
Your Bliss Button
There are natural ebbs and flows in our sex hormones. There are some notable points along your cycle that can enhance your sensuality. Estrogen peaks with testosterone at the midpoint of the menstrual cycle and makes some women more receptive to sex; that estrogen is essential for vaginal lubrication. Testosterone is the main trigger needed to prompt your sexual drive; it naturally rises along with your sexual urges during the second part of your cycle, right before the onset of ovulation. This is a great time for outward expression, to go out on a hot date or be social. It’s a time when your yang energy is strong and can be leveraged in your favor to embrace intimacy. Progesterone rises in the second part of your cycle, curbing the effects of testosterone on the body. Most women have a decreased interest in sex when progesterone is high in the last part of their menstrual cycle. This is a yin-dominant phase and a good time to turn inward, journal, be alone, meditate, put your rituals into practice, and make clearance.
Submitting to Sex
In order to get turned on, you have to tune out. Shut off your busy mind so that impulses can rush through the body and ignite the pleasure centers. Multitasking people have an extremely challenging time letting go of their “lists” and surrendering in the bedroom. This boundary prevents the body from completely melting into the throes of passion. Lots of people say, “I had sex because my partner wanted to, but I wasn’t really in the mood.” It’s very important to remember that if you are thinking about your dry cleaning, your to-do list, or your unpaid bills, then you’re activating the fear and worry center of the brain, the amygdala, which needs to shut off to facilitate heightened arousal and orgasm. So, what conditions need to be met for you to feel relaxed and in the moment? Is it a hot bath, a glass of champagne, a foot rub, ambiance, or music to set the mood? What about sensual touch with potions like Foria’s Awaken? Do you enjoy toys? Turn in and tune out. You owe yourself that experience.
Embracing your own sexuality goes hand in hand with the concept of reclaiming self-care. Loving your body and understanding how your body works is part and parcel with that. How can we ever truly surrender to our sexual desires and uncover our sexual needs if we don’t integrate and celebrate that the body acts as a vessel for them?
Join us Wednesday, September 23rd for the Mama Glow Webinar: Demystifying Sex & Intimacy for Millennials.