Stop Falling in Love, Start Rising in Love.

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Post by: Chandresh Bhardwaj, Founder of the Break the Norms Movement

A few years back, I had a conversation with a friend who was in his late thirties. We talked about the weather, politics, and movies, and then our discussion turned to love and relationships.

“So when are you getting married?” I asked him.

“I don’t know,” he answered. “I’m looking for the perfect one, you know. Miss Right!”

Our conversation ended there and we headed to dinner. Several years later, I ran into him at a family function. The first thing I had to ask was, “Did you ever meet Miss Right?”

“I did!” he exclaimed. “She was everything that I imagined she would be: gorgeous and flawless. Everything just felt so right.”

“Where is she?” I asked. I looked around curiously to try to spot her in the crowd. “When are you getting married? Or did you already get married?”

“Oh, we’re not married,” he answered. “She said no to my proposal. She was looking for her Mr. Right, and it wasn’t me.”

This story, which I shared in my book, Break the Norms, is a perfect example of what we’ve been taught about love. We believe that love comes in a particular form. While we are all so preoccupied with finding Mr. or Mrs. Right, we block ourselves from  great love. We don’t realize that pure love is all we need to strengthen our souls.

So, what keeps us away from perfect love? The answer isn’t a revolutionary one, it’s quite simple: You don’t have perfect love because you are not yet loving and forgiving unconditionally! That is what rising in love is all about: Unconditionally accepting love as it is.

The power of unconditional love is magnificent! It can heal our wounds and create space for new and better opportunities. Rising in love simply means seeing love unconditionally in all of its creation. There is nothing painful about love when we accept it unconditionally. How could there be? Acceptance is the way to freedom — and to authentic love. When we accept ourselves and those around us, we connect to a love that is divine and beyond all possessions.

In addition to loving unconditionally, when you rise in love, forgiveness becomes unconditional too. This forgiveness isn’t based on any conditions or requirements; it happens simply because it’s the right thing to do in order to heal a relationship. Rising in love is mature and divine.

Sufi poetry (including poems by Rumi and Hafiz) is an expression of love toward divinity. When you read this poetry, it may seem at first like it’s romantic in nature, but it really is about divinity. Love, like divinity, is a presence within us. Love and divinity aren’t two separate phenomena. You can surrender to either one and they will both come to you easily.


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Chandresh Bhardwaj is the 7th generation spiritual teacher and meditation guide. Hailing from a lineage of traditional Indian gurus, Chandresh started “Break The Norms Movement” with the intention to awaken human awareness from its conditioned self. By drawing on ancient Eastern traditions of healing, meditation, and transformation, Chandresh helps others awaken their inner selves and realize their highest potential in this modern time. His bestseller book ‘Break the Norms: Questioning Everything You Think You Know About God and Truth, Life and Death, Love and Sex talks about questioning everything we think we know about divinity, relationships, sex, and death.

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