5 Ways to Rekindle the Spark in your Relationship on Valentine’s Day
Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone!!!
I’ve always had mixed feelings about Valentine’s Day. I hate how it makes single people feel insecure or left out. I hate how it makes married people feel like they need to prove their love by spending money on flowers, jewelry and expensive dinners. What do I like? That it’s a time when everyone is thinking about love … and by extension, about sex!
I have nothing against jewelry, fine dining, or flowers (although I can’t say I’m a huge fan of red roses), but I dare you to make this Valentine’s Day about showing your love. And I’m talking about in ways that money can’t buy.
If it’s been too many weeks, ok months, where life’s other distractions have come between you and hot sex with your partner, use the time you’d spend trying to get The Dinner Reservation or the perfect tie and plan your own, one-on-one, Valentine’s Day encounter.
If you need some ideas, here are five of my tried-and-true “Ways to Reignite the Spark,” tailored for all you lovers on Valentine’s Day.
What is it about Hotel Room Sex that is so hot? It’s the newness, the feeling of anonymity, the crisply made bed with fresh clean sheets (and knowing you won’t be the one changing said sheets in the morning). If taking your partner to a hotel room for the night is out of the question, create a hotel room in your own home. If you have a guest room, make it up in a different way, turn down the sheets and put chocolate hearts on the pillows. Use your imagination to transform a space in your home into a sexy one-night hotel room made for love.
My favorite thing about lingerie is that it’s the gift that keeps on giving, for both of you. Don’t go out and buy new stuff – just dig out that sexy outfit he gave you on your anniversary that time and hide it under your robe. Stick a heart somewhere “special” to commemorate the day. It’s a great way to remember other nights you enjoyed this little outfit together and plan for more.
I’ve never been married but I know a lot of married couples who have great first date stories. Sometimes they even share their first sex stories, which I always love to hear. This Valentine’s Day you could surprise your partner (in bed) with something that happened during your first time. Maybe a song that was playing, or a perfume you were wearing. Something that involves the senses can take you back and rekindle those old feelings of newness and excitement.
Your own bedroom is also a perfect setting for a Romantic Valentine’s Day, as long as you do a bit of prep. Turn your bedroom into a romantic hideaway by filling it with sexy music, flowers and candles. My Aromatherapy Massage Candles from Emily & Tony help create the perfect atmosphere. They look beautiful on your nightstand, but they also turn into the most luxurious, moisturizing massage oil when lit. Start by dripping some warm massage oil from the lit candle onto your partner’s back. Then give them a full body massage. I’m sure they’ll find a way to return the favor.
Ok, most couples probably picture Valentine’s Day sex happening after dinner, when the kids have gone to sleep and the dishes are done. How about surprising your partner with a “Valentine’s Day Quickie” when he or she is least expecting it? Surprise her with a bubble bath and bottle of champagne right when she gets home from work, and make sure you have an extra 20 minutes built in post-bath (when the kids are allowed to play video games). Surprise him at work and rush him home for a quick “lunch.” Unexpected romance is always a good way to light the flame!
Have fun SHOWING your love this Valentine’s Day – I know you’ll have an awesome holiday!
Dr. Emily Morse of Emily & Tony
Emily is a sex and relationship expert, author, talk show host & Bravo TV star. She is the host of Sex With Emily, a radio show and podcast about sex, relationships and everything in between. Emily launched the Sex With Emily radio show and podcast in 2005 before coming a Bravo television personality on the hit show “Miss Advised.” She is also the author of “Hot Sex: Over 200 Things You Can Try Tonight.” Emily has her doctorate in Human Sexuality and has appeared as an expert on the TODAY Show, Dr. Drew, The Doctors, Bravo TV, Inside Edition, Watch What Happens Live!, MSN, TMC, E!, Style Network. She has also been featured in the New York Times, Los Angeles Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and Cosmopolitan magazine.
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